Tue. Jun 18th, 2024

Who Fails when a Child Fails?


There is substantial chaos between the process of   child development and the education system. There are a number of child development theories and an equally good number of systems of education. But, the current disarray is a question mark!

How many of you are satisfied completely with the status of your education?

……..One of you is dissatisfied?

……..Teachers and institutions are not satisfied?

In modern times, the parent’s sole concern is to focus on the grades of education.

This is very important in how we observe our child’s education status.

Our education system has specific forms. If a child who has great potential is unsuccessful, we don’t doubt our methodology but the child’s potential. We are not worried about our system. Our education system is the most significant reason to affect our child’s self-development, mental development, creativity psychological health. Every child’s basic need is to be satisfied with him. There is great stress in our child’s life and that is increasing at a great level.

The pressure of education, the pressure of examination, the pressure of failure.

The current situation of our education system does not produce successful beings in actual terms. We measure the intelligence of children on a very different criterion.

With the issues like handwriting, spelling learning, quick understanding, weak memory or loss of memory, phobia of different subjects, a child can be intelligent.

Our dilemma is that we consider him intelligent only when he takes very good grades otherwise his sense of self-worth is destroyed by our social setup.

If we amend our basic beliefs of education, we will be able to set and focus greater goals of education. We mar the whole thing to make him successful in terms of academic result. His sense of self-worth, his confidence is most often not being noticed. Grades should not achieved at the cost of confidence and sense of self-worth.

What does examiner expect?

A child has to learn with the perspective of examiner.

5 word phrase is magical…this will be asked in exams.

What is required in life? This is not present in academic vision. This tunnel vision is causing a great loss.

There is difference in exam skill and life skill. He must know the pattern of exam. A child who predicts his up-coming exam up to 70% can be successful in exam. Our examination system is flawed.



Three things are mostly focused:

Examiner’s psyche

Pattern of exams

Predict exams

This will lead to selective studies. He will prepare his content in a specific manner, speed and style; form and presentation.

Exams are our firmament; basic purpose. If a child is landed in professional institution, parents are highly satisfied.

Unfortunately, to think to be successful in this life and world hereafter is secondary.

We put a great pressure on child’s mind. We discuss him before him with others. We discuss his flaws before him. If you want to win your child, try to keep it secret between you and him. A child gets disturbed if you discuss him with others. We are quite reckless about this. We are concerned with his numbers more than his psychological health, self-esteem, confidence, inward state, his conscious awareness. Conceptual learning or creative potential is most important to develop.

I asked from children, “Have you ever experienced embarrassment and fear of academic results?”

We have developed an undue emphasis on the fear of exam.

Then I asked, “Who has ever thought of committing suicide, flee away from house?”

Education must be stress free; he should develop whole personality as a result of education system. He is creative, he is intelligent whether he gets good grades or bad, and examinations can only gauge the intelligence of a child with a peculiar perspective.

We need to work on extensive pattern on the system of education. The upcoming times require a different skill set to be successful in this society.

There are two types of compulsions. You become angry very soon and become happy very hard. This is called the forceful attitude by which we hurt our child deeply. We use very painful words and expressions for him. We behave negatively as an individual. Teacher and parents also face methodical issues along with temperamental issues.

How much likelihood is there for your child to be embarrassed and how much to be self-confident ad self-reliant in both of yours interaction. You must develop him to be happy, optimistic, confident, self -reliant to get the desired results and achieve greater parenting as well educational goals.



A child whose self-esteem is low, he doesn’t accept any challenge.  Work to develop his self-esteem high.  You must take care how much a child can feel good of your words, express ions, and body language. In this case, if parents or teacher’s teaching methodology is weak, a child is unable to face the challenges of time.


A child whose sense of self-worth is good, only he can face the test of time and trial. He is able to fulfill even undue demands of parents. We need to be aware of real teaching and training concepts.

System requires

Our system has rigid requirements. This is based on based on fixed curriculum, he has to pass through a specific tunnel; through a painful path. This may be anti to his personal inclinations. System is quite stressful, to save him from this pressure we should make better our education system. A greater attention is required to put to transform the whole education system.

Our mistakes

We did not set reasonably challenged goals rather set over-challenging or under challenging goals for him. We did not evolve his qualities and potential. Try to recognize his talent; make your relationship with him better, try to minimize the pressure of temperament, system and society. Select a school where he can get more respect and less pressure.

The educational purpose of a parent teacher meeting

1: Firstly, to help parent to develop confidence on their child,

2: Secondly, don’t talk about child before him because this can cause great humiliation.

Rather, pause teaching which is only stressful for him.

Improve his self –esteem

Minimize the pressure on him

Most importantly, most of our time and resources are consumed to make arrangements to prepare for and conduct exams.  In fact, 3 hours exam should not be your goal.

Our examination system is very cruel, this is disastrous. It is altogether anti to the greater goals of education. We mutilate a child’s sense of self-worth, his confidence, when we ask him to repeat the class to improve grades.





We should nurture a sense of achievement.

And minimize the effect of sense of failure.

We should be honest in evaluating ourselves and let the child do the same as well. There must be a healthy response for this. Strengths and weaknesses, both should be mentioned in the list of evaluation.

A child cannot give healthy response in stressful education system, we mar his sense of self-worth and give him mechanical training. There should be no exam until 7 years of age. Our education system has such disastrous practices which should be eliminated very urgently. Relax your child, don’t give stress to his innocent mind.

Educational system is not designed to develop us achieve the real purpose of life. We must be happy with a child and save him from our bad temperament and develop positive interaction with him.

His memory must not be checked before others, his sense of self-worth is destroyed by us. Actually, we should not embarrass him. This is not important that a child does not ask questions. This is actually the failure of our education system. The ability to ask questions is very important, we should enhance this ability. We should win our child as his own person.

We must inculcate in his mind:

“You are mine whatever you are, whatever are your achievements?”

Future perspective

Future is of portfolio, evidence of individual skills and not Curriculum Vitae.

Portfolio assessment, evidences of his achievements are more important in future. CV will become unnecessary in future.

Learning in our first language is again very crucial, this is another greater topic which should be dealt in detail separately.




By admin

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